Proverbs 22:6 ¶ Train up a child in the way he should go:
and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
This is one of the most popular verses in the
Bible, oft quoted and misquoted, but one from which parents derive a lot of
comfort. The first thing I would say for Christians is that the only way to
train up a child in the way he should go is to live before that child as the
kind of Christian you want them to be. The Bible also says very explicitly
things you are not to do and things you are to do with regard to raising a
child.
Ephesians 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not
your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the
Lord.
Notice the second part of the verse, to raise
them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Nurture and admonition carries
with it the idea of care and instruction. John Gill agrees that it is the
parents’ responsibility to educate their children in God’s ways.
This Proverb says that things taught soundly
early on will remain with a person when they have grown old. We all know so
many stories of young people, raised in a Godly environment, who left the care
of God and went out on the power of their own flesh and the enticements of the
world only to return to their faith when they were sick of themselves or had
children whom they wanted to be raised right.
What we do in early childhood has an impact on
our whole lives. My father had been in the military and when he was young and I
was a toddler it was his practice to get up very early in the morning and do
calisthenics before he started his day. My earliest memories are of trying to
imitate his pushups, situps, and jumping jacks. I was never much of an athlete
myself, never very successful at any sport, however from that time I learned a
habit of regular exercise and a love of it that has lasted my entire life.
While others, high school athletes in particular, sit around and talk about
past glory and busted knees I look forward to working out on my own as I get
old. This is because of the care that my Dad took when I was so small to
instill in me a love of exercise.
What a sad state it is that Christians don’t
care more for their child’s education in Christ. They expect the church to
teach their child about our Lord and that is just pure laziness. The church
body worships as a group, corporately, and does things for Christ that the
individual can’t always easily do on his own. The sermons and lessons are to
edify the believer and strengthen him to walk closer with God. However, letting
God speak to you through His words, speaking back to Him in prayer; praising
and have fellowship with Him, is essential every day. Worship itself should not
just be at times when the body of Christ meets but each and every day.
Christians miss out on a great way of life by
not having daily devotions with their family as a little church, with father as
Pastor. Daily prayer and Bible reading when the children are very young are
absolutely essential and important for establishing a firm foundation on which
the child can depend when they are older. Well, you say, I have never taken
much concern about my child’s spiritual education. I left that up to the times
he or she attended church and he’s fine, she’s doing well. Well, I’d say back
to you that you are probably a very carnal Christian and so will your child be.
In fact, probably right now, in all likelihood, your adult child, like
yourself, whom you never allowed to miss a church service, even forbidding him
or her to play soccer on Wednesday nights is probably standing with both feet
firmly planted in the world, in worldly Christianity if they are in church at
all, in worldly pursuits, with worldly aims and goals, and worldly
expectations. And there are things they are doing that they would never want
you to know about.
To young Christian parents, just starting out,
if you will hear me, start praying with your spouse today, and pray with your
children. Read the Bible to them every day in small enough doses that they are
able to hear but in large enough doses for it to have meaning to them. If your
devotions are in the evening then talk about what God has done with you and for
you today and how He has used you and refrain from complaining about what the
boss, a customer, or some thoughtless motorist or coworker did TO you.
Experience a life with Christ and share it with your child.
To those Christian young people who are
courting, getting to know someone in the right way with the intention of
marrying before God and their church family and starting a family either by
natural means or adoption, start praying together today. Read the Bible
together. Share your individual concerns with God and each other. This is the
one thing missing from most Christian advice about courting and marriage. There
is no time when it is inappropriate for two people to pray together, with
family around, to learn and grow in the Lord.
Train up your child in the way they should go.
When they are old they will not depart from it. It will be a real and powerful
part of their life that will sustain them through every crisis and lead them to
a closer relationship with their Creator and Saviour each day. Give them that
firm foundation.
On the other hand, you can train your child to
be a selfish, spoiled Christian brat who gripes about God and the failings of
everyone else in their life, who treats the Bible with disregard, rarely
darkens the door of a church building, and has a relationship with Christ much
like children of secular minded people do with the Santa Claus at the mall, and
unless God has mercy on them they won’t depart from that when they get old
either.
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